How Ridiculous

Tomorrow I am having some heart tests done.  I am going to see my cardiopulmonary doctors.  It is absolutely ridiculous that I feel a sense of looking forward to it.  Isn’t it?  Am I out of my mind?  Who looks forward to seeing doctors as though it’s a social event?

Perhaps I should feel sad about this?  I don’t.  However, I do feel a sense of pique over it.  I’m irritated over the irrational state of it all, the closet that I live in that has me excited over doctor visits.  The seclusion of my daily life that mirrors the seclusion of my brain, some forced on me and some chosen by me.

Oh well, may as well continue to enjoy this ridiculous situation I find myself in.  There may come a day, someday soon, where I won’t even recognize how ridiculous my life is.

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