It Can Get Very Dark

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I’m sitting here at 7:04 pm alone.  My husband is at work.

We want to retire, but we can’t just yet.  Medical issues thwart us at every conceivable corner and our life is no longer controlled by us but by whatever comes next after a visit to one or another Doctor’s office.

For instance.  We went to see one of my doctors the other day and came out of it knowing that I need yet another surgery.  I won’t go into the details here because there is only so much I am willing to share.  You understand.  Of course, you do.

The visit ended like the end of a board meeting.  “My people will get in touch with your people and set this up.”  My health has become a board room topic up for discussion.  I mean, there is always something going on that needs to be resolved each time we have a meeting!

How quickly things have changed and continue to change.  Even from last year, I see a dramatic change in the dynamics of our lives.  I don’t know who is CEO anymore.  I thought we were.

The onslaught of surgeries has done a number on me.  I’ve had four in just over a year and now I’m going to add another one.  I have a private surgical suite at the hospital, or at least I should.

Now?  My beautiful husband is at work and I’m here alone.  We are not happy campers but that is the way it needs to be for the moment.  He has responsibilities elsewhere as well that cannot be ignored.

What’s interesting is that my emotions are out of whack.  I think this is temporary due to being on steroids for several weeks.  I run high and then I run low.  I don’t much care for the low.  It’s very dark in there.  When I find myself in there, I scramble to get out.  I’m not one to hang around in such a place.  The important thing is to recognize when you’ve fallen off the beaten track.  If you don’t recognize that you’re off of it, then life becomes even more hazardous to travail.

Onwards and upwards!  Though I’m emotionally down quite often down and feeling blue, at my core I will beat this difficult time in my life like I always do.  The support of friends and family helps.  So all of you out there, speak up!  Comment!  Let me read or hear your encouragement.


Magdalena Obert
Magdalena Obert
I am a musician/composer who has traveled around the country as a freelance musician. I live and breathe music. I was struck down by MS (Multiple Sclerosis), and my life changed dramatically. I continue to write and compose music but I do it from home. One day, I came across a web site and saw candlesticks on a chart. I was curious about them because they looked rather like musical notes to me. I clicked on the site, which took me to I read a bit about it and learned that trading was a method of making an income, so I downloaded a demo. I didn't do anything with the demo account for a long time. I did watch the charts daily and learned how to use the platform. Mostly, I was intrigued by the movements of the candlesticks. They fascinated me. I began to get the urge to trade, so I started playing with the demo. I then came across a system I wanted to try, which I did using the demo account. The rest is history. I fell in love with trading. There is something musical about it. In particular, you never know what it is going to do next, which is oftentimes true in music. You think you know the next logical progression of a new piece of music and you anticipate it, but oftentimes, it surprises you and goes along a different path. Sound familiar? I'm a trader now, newbie for 7 years, but a trader.

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